People

What is wrong with people?

What I ended up doing was taking 1 week off sick, and working 1 week from home last week. I felt that was a good compromise. Apparently, that wasn’t good enough for some people.

I had a good stretch of about four nights where I slept for the entire night. It felt amazing. I felt like a had a much better handle over my emotions, life didn’t seem so gloomy, and I felt like life wasn’t too hard. That I could do this.

Yesterday, we finally got some news about my mom biopsies. It’s not good. On top of her returned lymphoma cancer, she now has stomach cancer, and that has propagated to her liver. She is in the hospital for another transfusion today, and Thursday she has a meeting with her oncologist to hear what course of treatment they have decided on, etc.

Last night I layed in bed, staring at the ceiling, for the whole night. I did not sleep one minute. I knew that the three coworkers who have been giving me sly attitude would have something to say about my working from home today again. I had an appointment with my specialist yesterday, and he agreed that working from home is a good compromise. (As opposed to going on medical leave straight out.) He wrote me a doctor’s note. I sent the note to my manager as an attachment in an e-mail, and wrote down a list of reasons why I think that due to the nature of my position, I think that I am an ideal candidate for working from home. I stared at the ceiling all night, worrying about what those two people would say about my working from home. I don’t think I even fell asleep for one minute.

When my alarm rang at 7:30, I was nauseous and shaky. I was having a blood sugar low. I got ready and came downstairs to my work set-up. 30 minutes after my start time, it started.

“Are you coming in the office today?????”

“Are you working from home for the whole week????”

“Wow, must be nice.”

Me, to one of the two : “Is that okay with you?”

Her : “Is what okay?”

Me : “My working from home for the week.”

Her : “Does it matter? It’s none of my business”

Me : “It matters to me.” (She was my very closest coworker, for years!) 

Her : “If your doctor tells you to work from home, it doesn’t matter what we think about it.”

What would you do? Is my baby safer with my working from home, where I’m stressed about what those women are saying about me, possibly ruining my professional reputation, or should I suck it up and go bleed and go be hypoglycemic at work, 3 feet away from them, to make them happy?

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6 thoughts on “People

  1. She is right…it is none of her business. Stop worrying about what other people think/say or might think or might say. No one is a better judge than you, so don’t judge yourself so harshly. You are doing the right thing, you are doing a great job at taking care of yourself and baby. Continue to keep ur sugars in check and relax, u’ll be fine. My sister in law is type1 diabetic and has 3 healthy kids…including a set of twins that she had naturally. She had to take a lot of extra time off as well. As for your mom, im sending all the positive vibes and prayers her way.

  2. Hugs Nancy! I would not give a crap about what they have to say. I know it is hurtful when people you used to be close to are unkind to you. But life is too short to worry about their bullshit. I would do what you want, and enjoy it. 🙂 Screw them!

  3. Your job here is to figure out a way to let go of caring what they say/think about it, because you are doing exactly what is medically best for the baby you are carrying–I don’t give a rip how close you used to be to either one of them–they have zero say and matter NOT AT ALL in the grand scheme of things. Shut it down–it will do you no good to dwell on that kind of negativity.

    I am so sorry to hear about your mom–sending healing thoughts. xo

  4. Sending positive thoughts for your mom. I know that situation isn’t making things any easier for you.

    As for your pregnancy, I think you are doing the absolute right thing for you and the baby. The doctor has confirmed this by providing you written permission to work from home, which, BTW, I agree is a great compromise.

    I don’t think this was in the ‘9 1/2 Things Not to Say to Pregnant Women’: consider your coworkers’ reaction practice for when you’ll be parenting soon. Everyone will have an opinion; most of them will be contradictory. Ultimately, you have to do what is right for you and your family. At this point, that means taking good physical care of yourself, getting plenty of sleep and getting your work done when you are able.

    {{{Hugs}}}

  5. Nancy, I’m sorry that your coworkers aren’t more concerned about you and your baby’s well being. I can only imagine how hurtful that is. And then, exactly what Alex said.

    Also, cancer sucks, and I’m so sorry to hear about your mom. She’s in my thoughts, as are you and the rest of your family, during this time.

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